We Have Moments

Aug 6, 2015 by

          While with some friends the other day, one of them told the rest of us about a guy she met through work. She was with him one night last week, and after some internal debate about whether or not to text him the next day, she did. He ignored her message. It made her feel as though he felt she wasn’t worth the courtesy of a response. Over the weekend, she called a friend to talk about it.

          “We have moments,” her friend responded after listening to her story.

          I was intrigued before even knowing the significance of that statement. Most people would have told her that the guy wasn’t worth getting upset about, but this friend of hers had something different to say. I listened carefully as my friend relayed the explanation behind her friend’s words.

          “We have moments,” her friend had told her, “and then we leave those moments. In each moment, you may feel happy or you may feel shitty; but either way, you’re going to move on from that moment to have other moments.”

          Her friend went on to say that every time you have a moment with someone, that person is reciprocating that moment with you. The moment might be brief, but you have to appreciate it, because every connection you have shapes who you are. You might not have that relationship forever, but you have to be happy for it and learn from it, and then just leave it. Accept that, in that moment, that’s what you needed.

          “And if you need more, it’s probably not that person that you want,” my friend made an excellent point of her own situation – the same point I’ve come to realize lately, as it took letting my moments with a guy go to see that he’s not what I’m looking for.

          The perspective of life as a series of moments that we leave for other moments emphasizes that each moment lasts only as long as we want it to. I like the power that offers: how quickly we proceed from one moment to the next is up to us.

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